The Power of Contentment—Santosha
“Santosha invites us into contentment by taking refuge in a calm center, opening our hearts in gratitude for what we do have, and practicing the paradox of ‘not seeking’” ~Deborah Adele, Yamas and Niyamas
I believe the niyama of santosha, contentment, to be the most important of all practices. To abide in santosha is to have a deep sense of gratitude for what we do have. I am not sure it is possible to be human and to not have any longings for change or desires for new things. But we can certainly notice when those desires arise and ask ourselves where they come from and if they are worth pursuing.
When Josh and I visited India in 2014, one thing that stood out to us was the extreme joy and contentment of so many Indian people. Most of the people we met would be considered at poverty level by American standards. But they were always joyful and happy to share their meager belongings. Ram Dass, a beloved spiritual teacher, once said that Indian people live as if they are their souls, and Americans live as if they are their egos. I think this is at the heart of contentment. If you are only your physical body, motivated by your ego self, then it is very difficult to every be content with what you have. If you live as if you are only your soul moving around in a physical body, then all you need is contained within your soul. This soul space has much simpler needs and doesn’t strive quite so much.
We are taught to be constantly seeking. The need to better ourselves, to make more money, to have upward mobility, to compare our productivity or success to others creates a constant state of discontentment. How can we ever be happy with what we have achieved or where we are here and now, if there could always be something better on the other side? I believe this thinking is at the heart of Capitalism, this constant striving ends up making us feel perpetually in a state of lack and loss.
How different would it be to live in a soul space? To be moved by the simplest of joys around us, to fully take in the quiet moments and the simple pleasures?
I fall prey to this lack of contentment too. I notice when I am striving for more, to reach more students, to achieve more “success,” to gain more attention. This is why it is so extremely important to return to the ethical practices of the Niyamas, over and over again. I need to reflect on my thoughts and aspirations and ask myself: What purpose does that desire serve? Will I feel content when I achieve that new landmark or goal? Or will I only continue on in an endless cycle of seeking?
Looking outward for contentment will cause continual disappointment. Continual striving and seeking only expends our vital energy. The only way to feel truly content is to be grateful for simple pleasures and joys, and to remember that in our soul space, we are enough.
Here is my list of ways to find the simple pleasures and to remember that we are enough:
Everything around you is alive: believe it.
Tell stories to stones, sing to trees, talk to birds.
Be fully in your body. Move, dance, swirl, sing.
Get out of your head and into the world. Look for wonder wherever you go.
Embrace the mystery – don’t be afraid of the unknown.
Learn to belong to place. Understand the past.
Slow down.
Don’t have a career: have a life. Find your calling by creating meaning in your work.
Foster ritual. Make each day a sacred ceremony.
Treasure change. Dance with the transitory.
Notice when you find yourself wanting the next thing, or looking for contentment outside of yourself. Begin a gratitude practice: either when you wake up or before you go to bed, list three things you are grateful for each day. Remember to say thank you, without any explanation or expectation.
Learn to fall in love with your life, just as it is.
